Wednesday, June 17, 2009

{ a slice of sweet conversation }

Mommy ( to Annabelle) : Hey Sug. ? ( short for sugar)
Annabelle : Yeah, Mommy?
Mommy: Who loves us the most?
Annabelle : Daddy.
Mommy (Smiling) : Yes Daddy. And who loves us even more than Daddy?
Annabelle ( without hesitation ): Oh Mommy, Jesus does.

That's right, Sugar. That's right.

Tuesday, June 16, 2009

{ For Whom The Bell Tolls }

I sat on the floor, in the corner of our living room, observing the empty space and the eerie way my voice bounced off the walls in an echo when I called out to my husband. In the mad rush that was filling and loading all our earthly belongings into boxes and the miles of bubble wrap and packaging tape that come with such a ritual, my little five week old son let it be known that just because we'd forgotten about our dinner, he had not forgotten about getting his. So I scooped him up in my arms and settled with him down on the floor, the flurry of moving day put on pause for a little bit, and then it all began to hit me. I could hear myself think and it scared me because I dreaded the deep surge of emotion that I had tried so hard to bury in box after box being loaded onto the U Haul, to be moved over the mountains, and across the state to a new home.

Then the bells from the Catholic Church adjoining the back corner of our yard began to ring out, their last call for Saturday night mass. As I sat there I thought about how much I'd grown to love those bells over the last five years of my life and remembered how I would always stop whatever I was doing to listen to their happy sound whenever they would ring, and I thought about how much I was going to miss those moments of peaceful reflection. Those bells expressed so well all my feelings toward this home sweet home we were about to leave...they summed up almost six years of memories made...hours of accumulated laughter, some tears, the birth of both our children and many beautiful milestones, great and small, along with the millions of just regular, ordinary sort of moments that make up life.
And as I listened to the familiar dong....dong...dong...the tears that had been pooling up in my eyes spilled out over my cheeks, as I felt an overwhelming pang of sadness knowing that I was hearing those bells for the last time.

The next morning as I stared out the car door window, familiarizing myself with the streets and houses around my future home, half pinching myself inside as we pulled up in front of the towering blue, circa 1909 house that we'll someday call home, half terrified at the task that lay ahead in making this house a home, I stepped out to the car, with a hopeful heart. It was then that I realized I was I hearing bells. Lood and clear, these glorious bells rang out around me. Goose bumps popped up all over my arms as, awestruck, I whispered my thanks to Him. In that moment I felt seen and known and loved as I listened to the bells ring in a new season as they had rung out an old,  His faithful love stunning me afresh.

But isn't that just like Jesus to send us little reassurances, like that.

P.S. - I cannot tell you how glad I am to have a blog full of memories to look back on, of the years we spent in our first home. It's one of greatest blessings of keeping a blog. That, and having the love and support and encouragement of each of you.

Monday, June 15, 2009

{ finding our rhythmn }

We are all settled in to the sweet little cottage. It's been a crazy full week with unpacking and setting up our life here, including evenings out, friends over, and the bridal shower of one of my dearest ever childhood friends that I got to decorate for and attend this weekend.
Go, go, go and rush, rush, rush, has been the rhythm of our life. But I am
looking forward to the rest of the summer, to a little slower pace of life as we are tucked away in our little one bedroom cottage without phone, internet, a debit card ( which I have handed in, as we have made the switch to a cash only budget this summer, in the hope that it helps with saving money) or even an oven to cook on. I am enjoying my little one burner hot plate and a toaster oven and I am going to attempt baking potatoes in it for dinner tonight. Starting yesterday I am being more intential about how I spend my days...incuding reading more, to Annabelle and in general. ( This book being our favorites of the week), taking longer walks, spending quiet moments alone with Jesus and my bible at the kitchen table in the mornings, devoting my days entirely to my children and to playing out in these sunny summer days. To spending our evenings just being together, taking long walks and have lengthy conversations, and cuddle sessions, and soaking up every single moment, so many of which are magical with our beautiful growing children. To seeing this particular chapter in our life as more than just a transition period or temporary, and not missing the sweetness each day holds...

Tuesday, June 02, 2009

I should be packing...

Instead of blogging. Especially while the kids are both fast asleep for the night.
But I ran out of boxes. And rubbermaids.
So here I sit, munching away on a dark chocolate bar that I just uncovered in the bottom of my dresser drawer and had stashed away weeks ago, compliments of my very own personal postpartum chocolate fairy -
You know who you are...And hopefully you know as well, how very much I adore you. For many, many reasons, in addition to the steady supply of chocolate of course.

To put it mildly, life is a wild and crazy topsy-turvy tangle of boxes and babies and lists and houses...such as the one we are leaving, in 5 days, the one we are moving into ( more on that in a minute ) and the one we bought on the other side of the mountains and are renovating...David and I are feeling excited and encouraged, a little bit exhausted and a whole lot loved and taken care of. We have had an incredible amount of support, prayer, and help and once again find ourselves overwhelmed by the faithfulness of God in meeting our needs. Two days ago, at this time, we had no idea where we would be moving after our house closed. We were starting to feel the pressure, as we have only 5 days left to be here. I was working on finding a short term rental for the next three months, while David finishes up work over here and while we work on getting our new house livable over there. Yesterday afternoon I probably called over thirty different apartment complexes, desperate to find something, anything...and I begin to notice this trend: if ( and it's a big IF )they offer a short term lease at all, the price is always higher ( a lot higher ), because it is so temporary. And then we got our hopes up when we thought this lady was going to rent us her teeny tiny cottage, but that fell through because she found someone who wanted to lease it for longer than we did. All of that yesterday, and getting no where...totally back to square one.
An hour and a miracle later, we are handed the sweetest, beyond our wildest imagination gift, the invitation to stay for the next couple months in the little place we lived in after we were married, which we've always called, the honeymoon cottage...a place and time in our lives that we hold the happiest memories of. David just happened to be driving by there after work, to see if maybe the cottage might just happen to be empty and if so, the owners just might happen to be open to letting us rent it for a couple months from them...they just happened to agree, and then happened to give us a killer good deal on rent, all of which just happened to be God's answer to our prayers. We couldn't stop grinning last night, and truly cannot tell you how thankful we are to know we will have a roof over our heads, after we leave here. Add to that the sweetness of getting to go back to our very first little love nest, that was and still is so dear to our hearts. I told David last night, if we ever and I mean ever doubt God's faithfulness, from here on out, I hope he gives us a good, swift kick in the rear.
Without fail. Every. Single. Day. He supplies our needs.
And we hold countless proofs of His love.
Of His perfect love.

" What father among you, if his son asks for a fish, will instead of a fish give him a stone."
- Jesus ( Luke 11:11 )

" All I have seen teaches me to trust the Creator for all I have not seen. "
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

Monday, June 01, 2009

{ well worth your time }

This uplifted me yesterday. So I have to share. I walked out of church, with tears running down my cheeks, asking Jesus to renew and expand my love for Him...I don't want a day to pass by that I am not growing deeper and being changed by the joy of knowing Him.
( oh and don't forget to pause project playlist first )